# October 20, 2018 Negative Post-3

October 20, 2018\
\
Yesterday, while working with my grandfather, there was an incident with a metal sheet. I'm not sure if it was my fault or his, but he got a small cut from the Iron sheet. He didn't say anything, and I wanted to ask if he was okay, but I couldn't bring myself to. I felt a mix of self-blame, fear, and the urge to cry, though I managed to hold back the tears at that moment. When I got home and my grandfather went out, I finally allowed myself to lie down and cry.

I realized that I might be experiencing insomnia. Despite feeling tired, I couldn't fall asleep. Sleep has been an issue for me since childhood, and insomnia adds to the chronic fatigue I often feel. The last time I watched "Juliet of Boarding School(寄宿学校のジュリエット)," seeing a girl cry made me cry too. I've been suppressing these emotions from elementary school until now. Additionally, I've never had my own room or a real home. Growing up, we always lived in rented rooms, and I never had any pocket money. Now that I can buy things, I find myself hesitating, perhaps because the desire for these things has been with me for so long.\
\
By ChatGPT translate\ <br>
