# November 06, 2018 Negative Post-7

November 06, 2018\
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An hour ago, I received hurtful words from Boyfriend 5. The school called to inform about my accumulated absences reaching 108 periods, and if it reaches 150, I might have to drop out. Boyfriend 5 answered the call when I dialed back. My mom messaged me on LINE, asking me to call him back later.

When I called, Boyfriend 5 said, "Do you even go to school? Going to work is easier than attending classes, you know." I replied, "I have classes for 9.5 hours, and I also have cram school. Is that considered easy?" He got irritated, saying, "Do you even attend cram school? You can't even perform well in your classes or job. What's the use of you?" I remained silent. Then, he brought up my mom, saying, "Do you know how much your mom spends on you? She has almost nothing left. You're useless if you don't go to school."

I've tried explaining before, but it's futile. I haven't voiced out my emotional struggles because I know they would be dismissed. Even if they heard, they would likely say, "What's the big deal? Is your pain even worth mentioning?" Yes, they wouldn't understand how long I've been enduring and how much mental pain I'm in. I want to cry, but the tears won't come. I'm sure I won't sleep well tonight. I don't know if I'll have the heart to take the driving test next Friday. I feel like I might end up alienating myself from my mom in the future.\
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By ChatGPT translate
